new sheriff in town

There are many things I am good at, but unfortunately discipline is not one of them. Anyone who has met my spoiled rotten pug knows that this does not bode well for raising a child. Bill and I both are softies and we pretty much let Winnie get away with murder. I initially insisted on a 'no feeding the dog at the dinner table' rule, which Bill quickly tossed out the window. Now Winnie sits at his feet during meals and gives him the big hungry-eyed stare and the occasional 'feed me' paw. (I have stuck to my guns on this rule and Winnie does not pester me for food.) When Winnie was a puppy we enrolled him in a puppy training class at Petsmart and although we did in fact complete the course, we did not follow through at home and thus all Winnie knows how to do is a mildly-competent 'sit' command. Even that's a half sit at best. We've absolutely never ever spanked him, not even when he chewed up furniture or peed on the carpet.

busted

So it will be quite a challenge for me to embrace my new role as chief disciplinarian of the household, one that I'm not looking forward to. I know that rules must be set and enforced in order to maintain peace and harmony, but I just hate playing bad cop. However I've seen more than a few obnoxious children and I always vowed I would never be 'that' parent, the one that just sits around while the little holy terror runs wild. When I see bad behavior, I need to address it and correct it promptly so that everyone knows what's tolerated and what's not.

We've had a few 'learning experiences' recently to test these resolutions. The first offender was Winnie, although I will fully admit this incident was partly my fault. I had just given him one of his absolute favorite bones, which he does not get very often. He was laying by the fireplace going to town on it when Caroline crawled over to investigate. She leaned her face down towards him, not even grabbing it but just trying to get a closer look. Winnie must have presumed she was coming in  to take it and he snapped at her. He didn't touch her or harm her, but it was a definite snap...the first time I've ever seen him do that to her. I was momentarily paralyzed with shock but then instinct took over and I smacked him on the head. Bill went bananas because I hit the dog, Winnie slinked away with his tail uncurled, and I felt like the biggest P.O.S. Meanwhile Caroline is completely fine and totally unfazed. But I needed to let Winnie know in no uncertain terms that it is NOT ok to snap at the baby. I certainly learned my lesson and I will definitely keep Caroline away whenever Winnie is eating dinner or a bone. He seems to only be food-aggressive; he doesn't mind if she snatches toys away from him. 

The other repeat offender around here is sweet babycheeks. She is smart and charming and funny, a lethal combination when used to try and get away with naughty behavior. She smiles ever-so-sweetly as she leans over to take a nibble out of my shoulder. She looks back behind her and grins at me as she crawls straight towards the tv and dvr. She beams proudly as she stands up in the tub. Most of the time I can correct her and re-direct her in the appropriate behavior without too much trouble but sometimes it takes several stern warnings before the message gets through. And then the sensitive rose just falls apart at my displeasure.

Bad mommy reaction #1: I want to fall out laughing because it's so overly dramatic it's hysterical.

Bad mommy reaction #2: I want to pick her up and soothe her and wipe away her tears.

Clearly I have my work cut out for me. It will be a challenge to toughen up and grow some thicker skin, but if not I run the risk of having the hellion child who runs wild on the Burger King playground knocking kids down and stealing their french fries. Or worse, ends up in Juvy at the ripe old age of 12. I'm not a big fan of spanking because it seems like a complete hypocrisy....'it's not ok for you to hit, but I can hit you when you're bad.' No bueno. I think time out is a good idea when it's structured correctly and the kid has to sit quietly and refrain from doing anything fun until they've calmed down, but I know plenty of parents who send their kids to their rooms for time out and the kid just plays with the 8 million toys in his room. No bueno. 

I think my mom takes the cake on creative parenting in this department. When my 'highly spirited' little brother was absolutely incapable of sitting still and/or quietly for any length of time in time out, my mom strapped him in his carseat on the kitchen floor so he was forced to cooperate. All was well until she strolled past the kitchen 10 minutes later and he had tumped himself over and was flailing like a stranded turtle. She had to improvise even further with my sister, turning her crib upside down to function more like a cage. I do believe there are several photos of me torturing the caged beast by placing toys juuuuust out of the reach of her imprisonment.

Hopefully I won't have to resort to such drastic measures. I'm pretty sure that what Caroline craves the absolute most is my attention, and when I put her down and walk away and ignore her for a few minutes she gets the message. But in the meantime, in the spirit of http://www.dogshaming.com/, I'll have a few laughs over the trouble she gets herself in.